December 30, 2008

Jeff Foxwrthy's Take on Teachers

Ok so I am not usually a Foxworthy fan but this was too funny and too true not to share!

You might be a school employee if... believe the playground should be equipped with Ritalin salt lick want to slap the next person who says, "Must be nice to work 8 to 3:30 and have summers off is difficult to name your own child because there's no name you can come up with that doesn't bring high blood pressure as it is uttered can tell it's a full moon or if it going to rain, snow, hail
...anything!!! Without ever looking believe, "shallow gene pool" should have its own box on a report card believe that unspeakable evils will befall you if anyone says, "Boy, the kids sure are mellow today."
...when out in public, you feel the urge to snap your fingers at children you do not know and correct their behavior have no social life between August and June think people should have a government permit before being allowed to reproduce wonder how some parents MANAGED to reproduce laugh uncontrollably when people refer to the staff room as the "lounge." encourage an obnoxious parent to check into charter schools or home schooling and are willing to donate the UHAUL boxes should they decided to move out of district think caffeine should be available in intravenous form can't imaging how the ACLU could think that covering your students chair with Velcro and then requiring uniforms made out of the corresponding Velcro could ever be misunderstood by the public
...meeting a child's parent instantly answers the question, "Why is this kid like this?" would choose a mammogram over a parent conference think someone should invent antibacterial pencils and crayons...and desks and chairs for that matter!!!
...the words "I have college debt for this?" has ever come out of your mouth


vwiller said...

I am going to steal this for my blog! It made me laugh out loud.

Ted and Shana said...

Ha ha, that's ok I stole it from someone else's blog too!